News

Comedians Say Screech Is A Hack

Details: Category: Screech Stories; Published on Wednesday, 14 September 2005 04:28; Written by Administrator; Hits: 2110

RoadComics.com is a site where stand-up comedians talk shop. Today, several stories with examples of hackery / jackassery from Dustin "Screech" Diamond popped up:

"If you're unfamiliar with Screech's reputation in the business, know this: Him incinuating that I might be a joke thief is like Richard Simmons calling someone a cocksucker. It's like Patrick Ewing calling you black. It's like a black fly in your chardonay or some other Alanis Morrisett lyric. It's the pot and the kettle and the dish and the spoon all packaged into one nice neat little fruit rollup of irony. And it kinda pissed me off. And technically, while it wasn't an accusation because nothing had happened yet, it did indicate that a storm was probably on the horizon." -Slade

"I middled for DD last summer in a theatre, adn he literally sat behind the curtain during my set with a notebook, writing shit down. I have a copy of his "contract rider", which is hilarious, if anyone wants to see it. Self important hack prick." - Michael Gull

Read it all for yourself:

http://www.roadcomics.com/greenroom/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=2758

Comedian Mike Siscoe's Screech Story

Details: Category: Screech Stories; Published on Monday, 30 August 2004 10:15; Written by Administrator; Hits: 2203

Comedian Mike Siscoe wrote in to ScreechSucks.com to share his Screech experiences:

I've had the "pleasure" of working with Screech not once, not twice, but three times. I was even fortunate
to catch his act when he first started. It's always nice to see a "headliner" with 10 minutes of material.
Don't get me wrong it was amazing, cerebral material. You can't go wrong with witicisms like "Have you ever
noticed that when you smoke pot you get hungry?" His poop jokes and "Fuck Slater" material shouldn't be
dismissed either, they are all gold.

I thought the karma police had punished me enough when I had to drive his ass around. One of our gigs was an
hour and a half away. That was a five hour night with the Screechster. I endured numerous stories of Mr.
Belvedere, his bout with Horseshack, and his near run in with the law for weed. At least the latter would
have given him some street cred.

After his hour and 20 minute set, all of which 10 minutes were remotely funny, his selling his
autographed headshots at 10 bucks a piece, and anothe hour long ride home, I thought I had seen enough of
Double D.

Then one day, I'm watching Star Dates. A reality dating show where they take has-been celebrities and
set them up with blind dates. Well if there is a has been celebrity show, you know Screech and Gary Coleman
are on the top of that list. I'm watching the Screech episode, he's on a date, trying to impress her, when
BAM, he uses my joke. RIGHT THERE ON TV!!

I don't know 100% that he has every used it on stage, but here's the proof he did mine on TV. Here's the
link. Just click on your choice of windows/realplayer.

http://www.eonline.com/On/StarDates/Profiles/diamond.html

[ED NOTE: link has since gone off-line. Archive.org has most of that page cached, but doesn't appear to have the video clip. Anyone?]

It's the Wisconsin orgasm joke. I've got my proof and my credibilty as to where that joke came from. Bottom
line is this. If it is funny and came out of Screech's mouth, it's somebody elses.

NOTE TO AMERICA: Stop being such STAR FUCKERS, he's a terrible hack and you are wasting your money to see a
"star". I realize that there isn't much going on in Topeka, but if you want to see a star, take up astronomy.

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Visit Mike Siscoe online at:
www.mikesiscoe.com

For more testimonials from professional comedians, visit our friends over at www.TheScreech.com